


Secret Santa

by k-i-s-m-e-t (guessimfloating)



Category: 19天 - Old先 | 19 Days - Old Xian
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Fluff, Light Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-02
Updated: 2018-01-02
Packaged: 2019-02-27 10:43:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,004
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13246551
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/guessimfloating/pseuds/k-i-s-m-e-t
Summary: “Look, let’s make a deal: The Humanitarian Club, which I lead, needs a few more volunteers for our Santa’s Workshop at the mall. We desperately need a photographer as our current one recently got sick with the flu and I know one of your electives this year was photography. I’ve seen your work and I’m pretty confident in your ability. You’d just have to take photos of the kids sitting on Santa’s lap.”“I..” Mo hesitated.





	1. Chapter 1

When Mo took the volunteer job at the mall, he had done so begrudgingly. It was punishment after all, brought about by boiled-over frustration that had fueled the language he’d used to respond to his teacher’s inquiries about his tardiness. It was the third time that week he’d been late. Put on the spot, he didn’t know how to explain that money was always tight around the holidays and he’d been walking to and from school each morning in lieu of the train.

  
He was monopolizing any place he could cut some corners to save a few dollars. The allowance he got wasn’t much, but he saved as much of it as possible. This year he’d told himself he’d get his mom something good for Christmas. He hated seeing that overjoyed look on her face when she opened his handmade or cheap gifts. Like the “Mom of the Year” plaque he’d made in shop class last year that she boasted about having on her desk at the hospital, or the cheap earrings he’d bought at a stand she still wore proudly several times a week. A person like her deserved better, she deserved the world, and it frustrated him that he was just a broke high school student.

  
Getting a job was, “Completely out of the question!” she’d barked when he had off-handedly mentioned it. It was her duty to provide for him, not the other way around. If they needed to make ends meet, she’d work double shifts, he couldn’t afford to slack off on his studies.

  
Seeing his taken-aback expression, she’d softened instantly. “I know you mean well honey,” she’d said a hand cupping his cheek, “but we’re doing fine.”

  
The command to, “See me after class!” had been given on the spot and when the bell rang Mo hung back, dread setting in. He waited until the room cleared before even considering approaching his teacher’s desk.

  
Taking a breath, he stood and gathered his belongings, packing them up slowly, stalling for time. Sweat from his palms smeared along the cover of his history textbook as he fumbled with it, slick fingers shoving it into his bag. He nearly yanked the zipper off his bag when his name is called.

  
The walk to the front from his back-row seat seemed infinite, blood pulsing in his ears, each step forward magnified in the now empty classroom. But then he was there, hanging back a few steps as if proximity could diminish his impending punishment. He figured this slip-up would earn him a few days minimum in detention.

  
“What?” Mo spat standing uncomfortably in front of the teacher’s desk. Agitation amounting from anticipation.

  
The man looked up with a raised eyebrow.

  
“Watch your tone with me, that little outburst you had this morning coupled with your tardiness has you looking at a week-long suspension right now.”

  
“What the fuck!” Mo exploded.

  
The man slammed his open palm down on the desk. “Language!”

  
Mo flinched.

  
He pointed a finger level with Mo’s chest. “One more offense like that and we can finish this conversation in the principal’s office.”

  
Mo clenched his fists, seething, he could feel his temper flaring but he nodded. A week long fucking suspension? His mom was going to kill him.

  
“As of today you have been tardy 13 times! 13! And you don’t just show up five minutes late, oh no! Sometimes you stroll in here 20 to 30 minutes late. I need an explanation for this, it’s completely unacceptable!”

  
When Mo remained silent the man rubbed at his temples, trying to ease the tension gathered there, then sighed.

  
“Look Guan Shan, I’ve seen a significant amount of improvement in your schoolwork and behavior this year. I’m proud of you. I don’t want to see you start backsliding, got it?”

  
“Got it,” Mo mumbled.

  
“Look, let’s make a deal: The Humanitarian Club, which I lead, needs a few more volunteers for our Santa’s Workshop at the mall. We desperately need a photographer as our current one recently got sick with the flu and I know one of your electives this year was photography. I’ve seen your work and I’m pretty confident in your ability. You’d just have to take photos of the kids sitting on Santa’s lap.”

  
“I..” Mo hesitated.

  
“Don’t feel pressured to do it but.. I’ll be frank with you, it’s either this or suspension. At least this won’t show up on your record. Also, I’d need you to be able to commit to doing it for two weeks, just until our photographer gets better.”

  
An image of his mother’s disappointed face flashed through his mind, he sighed… but two weeks?

  
“Ok, when do I start?”

  
His teacher smiled, glasses glinting. “Today.”

* * *

That afternoon Mo found himself at the local mall, and as the automatic doors slid open he was immediately engulfed in a retail wonderland, Christmas style. He wandered around for a bit, window shopping, eyes drinking in the season’s assortment of clothing and trainers in his favorite shop’s windows.

  
Truth be told, he wasn’t exactly sure where he was supposed to meet for this volunteer job, he hadn’t really paid attention to the details. He been too relieved that he wouldn’t have to explain to his mother his suspension and could instead spin the situation in his favor, as doing some community service out of the goodness of his own heart, having caught the holiday spirit. Yeah… she was going to see right through that lie.

  
In the food court he made his rounds, filling up on free samples to stave off his hunger until dinner. As he exited the half circle of vendors he could see a Santa’s Workshop display near the children’s play area. Tossing the toothpick the last sample had been on, he shouldered his backpack and headed over.

  
The site was bustling and he could recognize plenty of familiar faces from school. A few eyed him warily given his delinquent reputation, but most were absorbed in their duties.

  
Amid the group he spied Zhan and felt his body relax, not realizing how much tension had built up. This might not be so bad after all, he thought. Zhan barely talked but neither did he, at least he knew someone here.

  
“You too?” He inquired as he approached, bumping Zhan’s outstretched fist.

  
“In a way, my mom’s part of the PTA,” he stated as if that explained everything.

“Apparently they never get enough volunteers.”

  
“Where’s Jian Yi?”

  
“Why do you assume he’d be here? We don’t do everything together.”

  
Mo waited.

  
Zhan sighed. “He had clean-up duty after school & caught a later train, he should be here in a few.”

  
“Alright everyone,” a bespectacled girl addressed the group. Movement halted as everyone paused giving her their full attention.

  
“Last week was great and we had an amazing turn out!” Many in the group clapped and whistled.

  
“Let’s try to do even better this week,” she laughed. “You know your positions, if you have any questions don’t hesitate to talk to me. Let’s go out there and spread some holiday cheer!” A few whooped in response, Mo rolled his eyes.

  
They all drifted to their respective roles, and as the crowd thinned the girl’s eyes fell on him.

  
“Oh, it’s you,” she sighed in annoyance. Mo recognized her as his class rep from middle school. The same one that had demanded he stop playing cards on school time.

  
“Pleasure to see you too,” he quipped.

  
“Save it, come on so we can get you set up and out of my hair.”

  
Off to the side there was a trolley parked with several suitcases stacked on top, she pulled off the topmost one, resting it gently on the floor and unzipped it. Nestled between foam cushioning laid the nicest camera Mo had ever seen, let alone touched. She removed it from its casing and held it out to him.

  
“You’ll be shooting with this.”

  
Taking it gingerly from her, he cradled it carefully in both hands. The DSLR was a larger model, a Nikon D series, he tested its weight, pleased that it was nice and solid, felt good in his hands. He ran his fingers along the textured gripping on the side. The lens he could tell came standard but the depth it could shoot was still considerable. He’d be able to get plenty of clear, close up shots. Damn he was in love, he would in a few words, totally fuck this camera. It was sexy as hell and sensitive to the touch. Bringing it up to his face, he aligned the eyepiece carefully along the curve of his cheek and brow, lightly pressed the shutter release. The smooth click of the shutter opening and closing was music to his ears, like the purr on a nice sports car. He thumbed at the playback button to review the photo. It was displayed on the screen in crisp quality; a Christmas tree in a store front effortlessly preserved in time.

  
“Nice,” Mo breathed.

  
“The photos you take will save automatically & transfer immediately to that computer station,” she pointed “where we display them to allow parents to pick their favorite. There’s a tripod in that bag too that you’ll shoot from, you just need to set up in front of Santa’s chair. All I ask is, that at the end of the night you box everything up just how you found it.”

  
“Sounds easy enough, so all I have to do is take the pictures.”

  
“Yea, try not to fuck it up. Oh, also ruin that camera and I’ll kill you.”

  
“Noted.”

  
“Oh, one more thing.” She unfolded an elf hat, and held it out to him. “I need you to wear this.”

  
“I’m not wearing that,” Mo said dismissively.

  
A hand clutched his forearm and she looked up into his face, light obscuring her eyes behind thick frames, “Yes, you are.”

  
“Okay, okay!” Mo exclaimed. _What the hell was wrong with these people??_

  
To their left a child bounded down the roped off line, dragging his mother behind him.

  
She patted his arm. “You’re on.”

  
Once Mo set up the camera and tripod, which he would admit he struggled with, just a tad, things ran smoothly.

  
The first few kids, though excited, followed his instructions to smile and say cheese. The student playing Santa he was sure helped facilitate the process, the guy was really good with kids. He greeted them in a cheery manner and made them feel comfortable. He even calmed a watery-eyed little girl, wiped her tear streaked cheeks and got her to smile wide for the camera.

  
Mo couldn’t help but find himself chuckling at some of the jokes he could hear exchanged or Santa’s reactions to their wish lists. It softened his mood and he found himself greeting the parents and kids in similar pleasant manner. He was almost disappointed when 7:30 rolls around and they close-up shop for the day. Almost. Gathering up the camera and tripod he carried them both back to the trolley; unzipped the travel bag and folded up the tripod stowing it neatly in its compartment. Before packing up the camera he pressed the playback button, cycling through the images he’d taken over the past few hours, mentally making notes of where he’d succeeded and how he could improve.

  
“Nice work today,” a voice said and he was ashamed of the brief scream he emitted.  
“Could you announce yourself.”

  
The class rep leaned back, a smirk on her face. “Where’s the fun in that? Anyways, I saw the shots you took, good thing your stay is only temporary or our current photographer would be out of a job.”

  
“I…”

  
“You’re talented, glad to have you on the team. I’ll see you tomorrow,” she clasped his shoulder briefly before walking away.

  
Mo soaked in her words, a newfound vigor guiding his actions as he popped out the camera’s battery and stuck it into a portable charger to power-up overnight. I’m… talented.

  
The words carried him afloat as he left, waving an honest goodbye to the few stragglers. Zhan was still hanging around the set and Mo moved to see if wanted to walk home together but the other politely declined. Mo could see Jian Yi cleaning up the and he gets it. No explanation needed.

  
The high got him through the sliding doors of the mall exit only to be knocked flat on his ass.

  
He was blinded for a few seconds as the stupid elf hat he forgot to take off is knocked askew covering his eyes. Rage ensued.

  
“Who in the mother fuck is looking for death?!”

  
He ripped the hat off and was met with an outstretched hand in his face. Genuinely confused he looked up as the owner of the hand chuckled.

  
Fucking He Tian, of course.

  
“Don’t you have a graveyard to lurk in?” Mo bit out irritably, and smacked away the offered hand.

  
“Are you implying that I’m the grim reaper? I like that,” He Tian purred.

  
“That wasn’t a compliment.” Mo got gingerly to his feet, dusted his pants.

  
“Why are you even here? The mall’s closed.”

  
“I was doing some shopping,” he gestured to the small bag dangling from his wrist.  
Mo could tell by the bag’s logo it was from some pricey jewelry store. He rolled his eyes.

“Fancy gift for one of your admirers, I’m sure.”

  
“Not quite,” He Tian said but didn’t offer an explanation.

  
“Anyways, I gotta get going so are we done here?”

  
“I can’t lie you look pretty cute in that get-up,” He Tian said, looking him up and down. “Why don’t you come sit on my lap.”

  
“Yeah, you’re about the 5th guy to spit that line today,” Mo remarked pushing past him.

“Try again.”

  
“Hmm okay, you know you’re pretty cute when you’re wrapped up in your own little world.”

  
“The hell kind of comment is that?”

  
“I saw you walking, you looked content with yourself. A nice change from your usual mad at the world persona.”

  
“And for this you chose to knock me on my ass.”

  
“You bumped into me, actually.”

  
“Right.”

  
“Why don’t you let me walk you home?”

  
“How ‘bout no?” Mo said stalking off. Body tensed in anticipation of the strong arm he knew would swing around his shoulders and drag him off anyways but nothing came.  
He glanced over his shoulder but He Tian was gone. Weird.

* * *

The next day wasn’t as easy as the first. It was, in short, mild chaos.

  
Mo bounced a screaming baby on his hip as the mother and Santa tried to console its twin. He looked down into her ruddy face, eyes squeezed shut, tiny fists balled as she opened her mouth, silent for a few seconds catching her breath, little body vibrating with the subdued rage she planned to unleash. Mo sighed steeling himself for another round of screaming.

  
‘Why are you crying? You have no real problems, fuck I should be crying.’

  
“Say cheese,” he dead panned as the mother finally stepped out of the frame, the other child momentarily consoled.

  
The baby looked surprised in the picture but at least he wasn’t crying. Good enough. Handing over twin number two to Santa, he glanced at the endless line of parents and toddlers.

  
“Let’s get this over with.”

  
_Click!_

The daily 15-minute breaks were heaven sent and he executed his usual system of hitting up the food court, stopping at every food place offering free samples. By the time he had reached the end, his appetite was comfortably sated. There was still about ten minutes left before he was due for the second half of his shift so he sat on a bench nearby, pulled out his phone to review his finances. The amount he’d saved up so far gave him enough bandwidth to explore several options but he still had no clue what to buy his mom for Christmas. After making this much effort it had to be good, memorable, but what do you get the woman that claimed she had everything she’d ever wanted. He rested his chin in his hand in defeat. Ughh, this shouldn’t be so hard. The bench jostled and he glanced to his left, surprised to see Santa sitting next to him.

  
“Hey.” the guy offered, voice muffled by the giant white beard that obscured most of his face. One hand shifted his belly so he could sit comfortably.

  
“Hey..” Mo returned.

  
“Nice job out there today, I didn’t know you were so good with kids.”

  
“Likewise man, today was.. something else.”

  
Santa cracked open a bottle of water, taking a few gulps. “Yeah we have days like that but it’s generally smooth sailing.”

  
They sat in silence for a bit, the soft murmur of the bustling mall and crinkling of the water bottle drifted between them.

  
“You.. can’t take the costume of?” Mo asked, breaking the silence.

  
“Nah, can’t risk one of the kids seeing me and realizing Santa’s not a chubby jolly old white dude. Imagine if they found out he isn’t only not real but a high-schooler.

  
Mo laughed. “They’ll find out sooner or later.”

  
“That’s cold man,” Santa said but his grey eyes twinkled behind the spectacles.

  
Mo shrugged, checked his phone. “Crap, breaks up. I’ll see you back at the workshop.”

  
Santa raised an arm in farewell. “See you.”  
Mo jogged the short distance back, but couldn’t shake the odd feeling that he knew Santa. He couldn’t place why exactly, but the costume restrictions made it difficult to see what he looked like and his voice didn’t sound familiar. Whatever, he would ask him his name next time he had a chance.

  
As soon as he stepped back on site the class rep ushered him back to the camera, scolding him about tardiness being why he was here in the first place.

  
Face breaking into a scowl, all previous thoughts vanished from his mind as he double-checked the camera battery supply and adjusted the lighting. He’d just finished tidying up around Santa’s chair when the guy returned from break. Mo resumed his place at the camera as the line reopened and mildly subdued chaos ensued.

  
Two days down. A week and a half to go.

* * *

“Who the fuck are you supposed to be? Rudolph?” Mo addressed Jian Yi as he unpacked the camera and tripod for his shift.

  
“No,” Jian Yi sniffled, wiping at his vividly red nose. “I’m sick. I think I caught something from one of these brats.” He sneezed, open mouthed of course, snot and drool dripping.

  
“Gross dude, cover your mouth, you aren’t five,” Mo muttered hastily gathering his supplies so he could vacate the area asap.

  
Every day that passed without coming to a decision on what to get his mom was making him more and more irritable. Walking out to the set, camera at the ready, the sounds of crying increased the closer he got, an opposing battle cry.

  
_Please, just take me now._

* * *

 

When his break came around, he found himself anticipating the arrival of Santa. It’s not like Mo was looking for the guy or anything. Yet meeting up had become almost an unspoken ritual, in the same vein as Mo forgetting to ask for his name.

  
The question was always at the forefront of his mind but the guy was hilarious and Mo became easily swept up in the conversation, usually not realizing he had again forgotten to ask until he arrived home that night.

  
This time the guy showed up with dumplings that keep Mo’s mouth occupied the majority of the conversation, as pickings were light in the free sample area. A few of the vendors had caught on to his scheme and conveniently weren’t handing out samples when he came by.

  
“Can you believe that last kid spat up on me? I’m never having kids,” Santa declared shaking his head in disbelief.

  
“Yeah sucks to be you,” Mo chewed thoughtfully. They were quiet for a bit.. “Hey,” Mo started “This is kind of random but what’s your name? I didn’t catch it the first time we talked.”

  
Santa paused, swallowed. “It’s uh Li Jie,” he said slowly.

  
“Oh.” Unfamiliar. “I guess I don’t know you after all, I know pretty much everyone at school.”

  
“I tend to blend with the crowd,” he shrugged, eyes focused on the waning dumplings.

  
“That’s cool,” Mo said, popping another piece into his mouth. “Me too.”

* * *

 

The week ended and casually spilled into the next. Mo had gotten used to the ebb and flow of the volunteer job, and could proudly say his photography skills had improved considerably. Li Jie and he were becoming good friends but there was something off about never actually having seen the guy out of costume, which Mo joked about. Actors like Li Jie, along with a few others who played Santa’s elves had to get dressed in the mall restroom or come already in garb. Li Jie had a habit of disappearing by the time Mo had finished packing up the camera equipment for the night. He had even invited the guy over for dinner one day but Li Jie had politely declined claiming he was behind on his schoolwork. Understandable, given the fact that they spent three hours after school at the workshop. He had promised to come by once the job ended, a week after Mo’s punishment. Mo had even vented to him about his struggles in finding his mother the perfect Christmas gift, asking him what he should get her.

  
“You know your mom best,” he had said. “I’m sure she’ll appreciate any gift you give her. Just remember it’s not about the price but the meaning behind it. If the effort comes from a good place, which I know it does, she’ll love it.”

  
It had brightened his mood at the time but he still wasn’t sure what to get her.

  
As much as Mo thought he understood life and might even be one step ahead, it had a way of knocking him back ten feet when he least expected it.

  
“10-4, we gotta brat,” Jian Yi muttered off to his left, pretending to be occupied with adjusting decorations on the set’s Christmas tree.

  
Mo twisted on his stool, turned his attention to the line, eyes widening as he watched a mother wrangle her screaming daughter into her arms and walk up to Santa’s chair. The girl had a handful of her Mother’s hair and was yelling for all she was worth, limbs flailing.  
“Man,” Zhan whispered, “my sister was bad but never like this. “I hope this guy can handle her.”

  
Mo watched for a reaction from said Santa but it was hard to gauge anything given how much of his face the beard obscured.

  
The mother looked embarrassed and nervous as she handed the screaming child over to Santa. Mo had to give it to him, the guy was composed, bouncing the girl on his knee, cooing to her, easily calming the crocodile tears. The mother beamed at the turn of events, whipping out her phone to snap a few tear-streaked pictures.

  
Mo relaxed, relieved to see the situation easily diffused, his heart bloomed a bit in pride for his friend, which he quelled, brain cycling through the mental gymnastics of why he doesn’t actually really care.

  
Mo had to give it to the guy, he was really good, he watched as Santa leaned in, beard tickling the little girl in his lap, she giggled in response. At this point the lines were rehearsed and Mo could imagine him asking her what she wanted for Christmas. She pondered, tiny face scrunched up in clearly serious thought, then suddenly a tiny fist shot out and she yanked his bread down around his chin.

  
Mo was on his feet instantly, because no, no way, this couldn’t be happening.

  
“Ah shit,” he heard Zhan mutter off to his left.  
Mo turned on him.

  
“You knew,” his voice cracked. Zhan looked pained.

  
“10-4 He Tian is fucking Santa!” Jian Yi whispered loudly behind them. “He’s fucking Santa, are you guys seeing this!”

  
“Who’s fucking Santa?” another student offered with a snicker.

  
“Guan Shan..” Zhan said, but Mo doesn’t want to hear it. He felt nauseous and too hot, his hands shaking, like he couldn’t breathe, as if all the air had been sucked out of the space. Mo bolted because fuck this, he would rather have suspension. He can’t believe how stupid he was, how oblivious he’d been, everyone must have known but him. What a fool.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He was overreacting, why did he always overreact? There was no need to leave like that, he could have addressed the matter with He Tian after. Stupid. He squatted, buried his head in his arms. Why did things involving He Tian always get him so worked up?

His legs moved on their own accord, running blind, unsure of his destination, and not fully comprehending why he was running to begin with. He shouldered his way through the crowded mall, tripping over shoppers, shoving bags out of the way. He landed at a staircase that lead up to a rooftop exit and doesn’t hesitate, gasped at the air after shoving through double doors. His mind was still wrapping around the reality that Li Jie was He Tian. Out of everyone in the world, why did it have to be He Tian?

He was overreacting, why did he always overreact? There was no need to leave like that, he could have addressed the matter with He Tian after. Stupid. He squatted, buried his head in his arms. Why did things involving He Tian always get him so worked up?

It took a minute but eventually he got to his feet, head foggy, throat thick and no he wasn’t going to cry. But he could already feel the prickling, burning sensation and scrubbed a hand across his face. Finally, he really took in his surroundings. He was on the rooftop of a parking garage; approaching the edge, there was a decent view of the city. Resting his elbows on the ledge, he watched the flow of activity beneath him. Shoppers hurried in and out of their cars, the busy street a Red Sea of headlights. Breath emitted in foggy puffs as he calmed his breathing. He shivered realizing how long he had been out there, coat forgotten in his haste to distance himself. He jumped when a hand landed on his shoulder, spun around arms up in defense, fists at the ready.  
  
He sighed in relief to see it was only He Tian, then choked mid-way because, shit, it’s He Tian.

“What do you want,” he ground out, thankful his voice carried some weight, didn’t sound as high and tight as his chest felt.  
  
He Tian looked, for lack of a better word, ridiculous. Still clad in the Santa Claus outfit, though he’d removed the stomach, the beard dangled awkwardly in his hand.  
  
“I already know you’re a fraud, so I really don’t see what there is to discuss.”  
  
He Tian shuffled, tipping his weight to one side, yanked a hand through his hair.  
  
“Look, I messed up, what I did was-“  
  
“Evil and sinister but that’s your general character so I can’t say I’m surprised.”  
  
There’s a deep rumbling sound and Mo trailed off because He Tian was laughing; laughing at him.  
  
“Evil, Guan Shan, really? Dishonest, oh most certainly but sinister? Let’s cut out the middle school dramatics.”  
  
It was true but that didn’t mean Mo had to like it, let alone tolerate it. “Your ego literally knows no bounds,” he shot back. “Middle school dramatics? Says the guy running around in disguise. Says the liar.”  
  
“This was my job, I didn’t lie.”  
  
“No? Li Jie? You’re honestly full of it.” He shoved off the ledge, not back inside just as far away from the other as possible.  
  
This time the arm came, not around his neck but a hand around his bicep, tentative.  
  
“Mo wait please,” He Tian said, voice strained. The words spilled out in a rush like he was desperate, giving Mo more pause than any force could. He waited.  
  
“I’m sorry.”  
  
Mo turned, shook off his hand, “what?”  
  
“I said I’m sorry, it was stupid and manipulative, but so worth it. For once I could talk to you with ease, laugh, joke, not have to scale all these walls you put up before I can even get a word in.”  
  
“I don’t put up walls,” Mo said defensively.  
  
He Tian laughed out loud, it sounded hollow as it echoed around the vacant space. “You are so heavily guarded I’m surprised you’re not a recluse.”  
  
“But,” he said seeing the deepening of Mo’s frown, “this week you opened up. Hell you actually asked me for my help, my advice, even when you were in serious trouble back then with She Li you didn’t ask for help.”  
  
“We weren’t friends, why would I have?”  
  
“Guan Shan, what I’m trying to say is I enjoyed the past week and a half, I know you did too. Maybe because it wasn’t me, as far as you knew, but I wish that it could be in the future. I was wrong but I want to make things right. You liked Li Jie right? Can we start over and this time you can get to know me?”  
  
Mo opened his mouth, closed it. Had he enjoyed the past week? Yeah. It was not that he’d spent it with He Tian that pissed him off. It was that aspect of forcing his will, belittling his right to make his own decision. Yeah he had walls up but how else could he buffer opposition? As soon as he let someone in they tried to control him. He peered up at He Tian and it was almost laughable how conflicted he looked, one hand gripping his elbow, face etched with concern.  
  
“Okay.”  
  
“Okay..?”  
  
“What you did was shitty and underhand but we can start over” he held up a finger, when He Tian opens his mouth “but on my terms.”  
  
“On your terms,” He Tian repeated slowly, turning the words over on his tongue.

They’re quiet for a bit, Mo considering.  
  
“I just don’t get why you put so much effort into this, into us,” Mo said, tipping his head back to look at the sky.  
  
He Tian followed his gaze, sighed in content.  
  
“I don’t know, sometimes you’re just drawn to people.”

* * *

The volunteer job thankfully came to a close and Mo was relieved but also wistful, he’d miss taking pictures, the camera, screaming kids however not so much.  
  
He let He Tian walk him home that night, heartbeat speeding up every time their hands brushed together, the touches building up like static.  
  
“You figure out what you’re gonna get your mom yet?” He Tian said, breaking the silence.  
  
“No, at this point I’ll probably get her a gift card or something.”  
  
Mo walked on, frustrated and disappointed, ready to chalk this one up as another failed year. It took him a moment to realize He Tian was not with him, and look back. He Tian was stopped in the middle of the sidewalk, head craned back looking at the stars. Brought his head up when Mo called his name, telling him to stop fucking around.  
  
His lips are stretched in a grin, mischievous look on his face.  
  
“I have an idea.”

* * *

Mid-morning sunlight slipping between the cracks in his blinds roused Mo from an otherwise dead sleep. With the pressure of the last few weeks of school before the new year, combined with the hours of his volunteer job, he would have been hard pressed to say this wasn’t one of the best sleeps he has had in ages. He craned his arms over his head, stretching, his joints popped in response, laying back content. Cautiously he peered over the edge of his bed but the futon he’d set up last night was empty.  
  
 _What the hell?_  
  
He froze, turned slowly to his right, breath catching at the sight. He Tian lay curled in his sheets, far from where he’d left him the night before, arms wrapped over and around a pillow. From this perspective he looked innocent, face loose and tranquil, the sight not upsetting Mo as much as he thought.  
  
When he’d found out that He Tian usually spent Christmas alone something had pulled at him, mouth working while his brain tried to catch up. He’d insisted, despite his better judgement, that He Tian spend Christmas Eve and Day with him. He Tian had brightened and smoothly accepted the invitation. Mo’s mom was delighted that the top student in his class had nowhere better to be on Christmas Eve than her house. Thankfully she hadn’t pressed the matter of why He Tian wasn’t with his own family and had simply welcomed him with open arms when he’d showed up on her doorstep, overnight bag slung on his shoulder. Later that night there was a gift under the tree with He Tian’s name on it, making Mo take a moment to marvel at how blessed he was with the mom he had, she thought of everything.

He was still gazing at He Tian, lost in thought. It took him a moment to realize the other is up and returning his gaze. Mo jumped, almost ended up on the futon below, opened his mouth with the obvious question on his lips. His mother’s voice at the door cuts him off, two sets of eyes darting toward it in anticipation, but it remained closed.

Mo exhaled, glanced back at He Tian, unspoken request hanging between them before he drew back the covers and shuffled to the door to answer.

When he closed the door and turned back to his bed He Tian was on the futon.

Mo cleared his throat awkwardly. “Breakfast is ready, we should go eat, mom gets pissed if I wait too long and the food gets cold.”

They got dressed backs turned, facing away from each other, like they were in the locker room at school. Mo would be lying if he said he didn’t linger on the glimpses he caught of He Tian in his dresser mirror. Eyes traced the neat sculpting of his strong back, broad shoulders funneling to a neat waist tucked in boxers.

He Tian caught his eye in the mirror, paused half turned arms lifted, shirt around his neck.

Mo spun, excuses flying. “You’re not supposed to be looking!”

“Says who? And it’s not fair if only you get a show.” He rolled his hips seductively.

It took Mo a few tries to get his own shirt on.

He Tian laughed from the bed where he sat now fully dressed, watching unashamed. “I had no idea you blush with your whole body, it’s cute.” He dodged the book tossed in his direction, laughter increasing.

At breakfast Mo was mostly silent, pushing food around on the plate. Would his mom like the gift he’d picked? He Tian had insisted she would but he couldn’t help the clench of his stomach when she cleared their plates and ushered them into the living room.

“You first,” she said handing He Tian a slim box.

He Tian’s mouth dropped open a bit. “But I didn’t get you anything…”

Mo’s mom waved a hand in dismissal. “Open it, open it!”

He Tian hesitated a second, then he was tearing off the paper to reveal a white department store box. His hands shook slightly as he lifted the lid, parting the tissue paper. The sweater was a deep grey, soft texture, it matched He Tian’s eyes perfectly. He held it up to himself than pulled it on, turned to face them, and..  _damn._ An excited squeal left his mom’s lips.

“I knew it’d look great on you! Doesn’t he look nice honey?”

“Yeah,” Mo mumbled, eyes trained on He Tian’s shoes.

“Thank you!” He Tian said embracing her, cheeks tinged pink.

“Okay!” She clasped her hands moved to retrieve a few boxes and dumped them in Mo’s lap, “Your turn.”

When he’s unwrapped the last gift and set it aside  _finally_ , it’s her turn and Mo moved to pull out his gift out from behind the couch where he’d hidden it, knowing his moms tendency to peak.

“Sneaky,” she smiled as he handed her the wide, flat gift.

“To Mom, love Guan Shan,” she read eyes twinkling.

“Mom…”

“I’m going, I’m going.”

She gently eased open the wrapping paper, each piece folded carefully and placed to the side. Underneath was a large frame that she flips over to reveal a black background lit up with bright white dots, lines connecting some into different shapes of all sizes, all laid within a neat circle. At the top was written “Your Special Day”.

“I- what is this?” She looked up, confused smile on her face.

Mo gripped his elbow. “I-It’s a star map. You can get a snapshot of what the night sky looked like on any day you want. I-I picked the day you and dad got married. You always told me he was your soulmate and I wanted to get you something special… meaningful this year.”

It was quiet for a bit and when she looked up her eyes were wet.

_Shit. Crap he’d messed up._

 

“If you don’t like it, I think I can return it,” he said hurriedly. “I didn’t mean to make you upset!”

“Honey,” she wiped at her eyes. “This is wonderful, thank you.”

“But you’re crying…”

“Not all tears are bad Guan Shan,” she laughed. “This is just unexpected …but so perfect.” She pulled him down next to her on the couch to hug him tight.

“I know we don’t talk about your father a lot and… I’m sorry.” She wiped at her eyes. “Given the situation it’s hard sometimes for me because of the memories it brings up, mostly good but sometimes bad.” She cleared her throat, “but I know you miss him as much as I do. I know he hasn’t been present but that’s not his choice and he loves both of us so much. Until the time when we can have him fully in our lives again I… I don’t want us to forget that fact.

She stroked a hand down the frame, smiled at him.

“I think this will help.”

* * *

Later that night Mo walked He Tian home for a change. It was peaceful, the streets quiet with everyone indoors with their family.

They lingered at his apartment door, neither really wanting to leave but unsure of how to ask the other to stay.

“Thanks,” He Tian said “for everything.”

“It was nothing,” Mo mumbled. “If anything I should be thanking you, my mom loved the gift.

“I told you, it’s the meaning behind the gift that matters most.”

“Yea,” Mo said, though he could feel another blush coming on. “Well, I’ll see you,” he waved, moving to leave, but He Tian caught his arm pulling him into a hug.

His body stiffened at first in surprise, then he relaxed, lifting an arm awkwardly to pat He Tian’s back. They stayed like that for a while, his nose buried in the other’s chest. He Tian smelled good, a mix of cologne (one that was a little woodsy, like cedar), and something else he couldn’t place but thought it must be He Tian himself -a scent that clung to his sheets at home.

A hand cupped his chin tipping his head up, scattering his thoughts. He could see lips inching closer to his. This time he let his eyes flutter shut, mouth parting voluntarily, but the lips fall on his cheek, just shy of the corner of his mouth.

He Tian was watching him, eyes dancing when they part, a final farewell before he stepped back into his apartment and Mo’s feet worked enough to get him to the elevator.

Inside he pressed the button for lobby, his hand drifting up, fingertips absently running along where He Tian’s lips had been a moment ago.

There was a commotion in the corridor as the doors were closing and suddenly He Tian was there prying them open, shoving a bag into Mo’s hand without comment, doors sliding shut before Mo can question him. He was so shocked it didn’t occur to him try and hold the elevator until it had begun it’s decent.

The bag he recognized as the same one from that day at the mall when he’d fallen.

The same one he’d thought had been for an admirer of He Tian’s.

In the lobby he sat on one the benches, curiosity driving him. He upturned the bag, catching a slim flat box about the size of the palm of his hand. Lifting the lid he held his breath, unsure what he would find as He Tian was unpredictable.

Nestled inside was a brown velvet drawstring bag. Opening it, he shook an orange bracelet onto his palm. It’s weighty. He fiddled with it trying to unfasten it’s clasps. It opened like a vice once undone and could be locked back into place. It was… extremely nice, it’s design simple, he had to admit He Tian had good taste.

He thought back to the last time he’d been given a gift, how it’d been forced onto him. Resentment had been his first feeling receiving that gift, though he still had the earrings tucked away in a drawer, he couldn’t just throw them away and his gut told him he’d want them later on. This time He Tian had looked nervous, so unlike the untempered confidence he’d had back in middle school.

Replacing the items he found a note wedged into the box’s corner. He pulled it out, slowly unfolding it.

_I haven’t seen your bracelet in a while, I thought you’d lost it._

‘A while?’ Mo scoffed, more like years. How did He Tian even remember that? Did he pay that close attention?

He replaced the note, pocketed it as he rose from the bench, and headed home. He’d text He Tian later, tell him thanks.

As he walked he thought back over the past few weeks and recent developments.

The new year looked promising.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anddd that's it, thanks for reading :3

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the tianshanxmasevent on tumblr, this is Day 2 (Presents) 
> 
> Let’s talk tianshan! I can talk about these two for days hmu on [Twitter](https://mobile.twitter.com/instantkismet) or [Tumblr](http://k-i-s-m-e-t.tumblr.com)


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